Rights of a care provider

I did the same thing where I lived with and provided support for a woman with cerebral palsy. As far as where they move or the type of property, you can voice your opinion, but this is your roommate's residence, so they will choose a place that is good for her (close to her job if she has one, close to family and the facility that manages her support). Now, if they do choose a place that is not good for her situation, you can tell her case manager, but other than that, it is her choice.

As far as where things are organized in the kitchen and decorations, you can decide these with your roommate as you would with any other roommate, but you have to have an extra sense of sensitivity. As with my roommate, people who have autism have a much harder time dealing with change than other people and so you will have to pick your battles. It's a hard job to do, because you are giving up certain freedoms you would have in other places, but you are helping your roommate have a sense of independence. It's worth the sacrifices.

Make your room your sanctuary - you have every right to do what you want in there, as far as the other stuff, pick your battles as you are there to support her. Good luck!

It is not the roommate that is causing the problem. It is the Mother that is coming in whenever she wants to and making our house the way she wants it.

It is not the roommate that is causing the problem. It is the Mother that is coming in whenever she wants to and making our house the way she wants it.

Really? That seems odd, but she does technically own the house probably (or at least in my case). When I lived with my roommate, I pretty much let her arrange things any way that she wants, but my room was my room.

As I'm sure that you know, people with Autism are extremely resistant to change. It makes them depressed and anxious. Perhaps the mother is trying to reduce your roommates anxiety that she may not be sharing with you. I would talk with the mother and see if she is just being controlling, or is just trying to keep things the same for her child.

I know how difficult it can be, but you are there as your roommates support, so maybe make your room your individual space and let everything else go. Just curious what is it that she is moving back?

Also, her case worker at the state agency will assess her needs and decide the best place for her to be. If you have an opinion on where you would like to live if you have to move, I would let the case worker know so she can take your opinion into consideration.

This answer was edited by Jodi-Mesa 222 days ago.

Reason: add