I sympathize with your situation which is VERY common, especially since he is just reaching that age of atonomy where he realizes he is a person with needs and can demand things from the people he has the most contact with. BUT that is all the more reason to set boundaries and teach him there is a time and a place to get his needs met appropriatly.
So what I would suggest is to first talk to your son and explain to him number one, that you do not interupt when adults are talking and number two that it's important that mommy and daddy talk because you are best friends and to stay best freinds, you need to talk. Then make dinner family time and involve him in your conversation, but make it clear that he has a turn to talk and a turn to listen. Tell him, "why don't you tell daddy what we did today" and encourage him to share and remind him about specific details like "where did you go" "who did you see" "what was dora the explorer about today" and encourage him to share his story. Then when you sense he is done, have your husband tell him that sounds like a great day or somthing encouraging. Then make it very clear, now it's daddy's turn or mommy's turn.
Also, somthing that will help, is give him and your husband time at night that is all theirs so he can look forward to it and it can be a reward since that is what he wants (and it gives you a break). My dad read me a story every night before bed (and now my husband does the same to our daughter). It's their time for about 30 minutes and his focus should be completely on him. This will also help you have a routine bedtime schedule (7:30 or 8:00 is good for a 3 year old).
It may take time, but your relationship and the tools you give to your son will be worth it!
Submitted 338 days ago...
Balance: Child and Husband....?
I have a three and a half year old boy that I stay at home to take care of....My husband works full time. When my husband is home my son is always trying to get attention, even though my husband has spent time with him when he got home....Every time my husband and I begin talking about our day or other important stuff my son will stand there and demand the attention from his father...We tell him that mommy and daddy are talking and to go play, he says no, at the time he only wants daddys attention....Its driving me freaking crazy....We have tried to wait till he goes to bed to talk about anything we needed or wanted to, but my son goes to bed so late some nights that both of us are too tired to even watch tv muchless talk about anything.....Any suggestions?
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Submitted 338 days ago...
Establish a time that is just for him and daddy. Although he may play with him right after work still set up a time that he gets to chose what they do. It can be a 1/2 hour - 1hr. If dad needs to get some work done and he wont leave daddy alone then have a bathtime set up or if he likes to play with something by himself let him do that. It sounds like it would help alot the get him to bed by 8:00.
Thats a task by itself. Routine, routine, routine....do bathtime,snack, play with daddy in an order that works then put him to bed and be firm!! Do what suppernanny does...read a book or play with daddy in his case, say goodnight and put him to bed. If he gets up say again it is time to go to sleep, if he continues to get up do not say anything to him-pick him up and put him back in bed. He will give up eventually and go to sleep.
You should also make a small chart to show the times he gets to play with daddy and give him a timmer so he will leave you two alone and when the timmer goes off it's "daddy and me time".
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Submitted 331 days ago...
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