Mouthy ten year old

Well iam no expert but you shouldnt spank him......mabe you should use his favorite thing aginst him and make him mind by telling him he cant see or play with his favorite thing until hes good......if that doesnt work then put him in the corner or mabe talk to him throughly and tell him his right from his wrong.

Consistency is key. Also, make it very real for him in regards to removing prevliges and make them stick. I've got a son who became very forgettful for a time - things like turning in homework, etc. I started forgetting to get what he wanted for meals, forgetting that he was allowed to watch TV, etc. Worked well. As for disrespect, my older son knows that if he does that, he'll get embarassed in public and in front of his friends, which he deathly fears. As long as you are consistant, it will work. Good luck.

Being a parent is work!! the man got it right, Mtnrescue, CONSISTENCY is the answer!
Our son, wife & 2 kids just moved in with us, 8 yr old out of control. I told son, give child 2 warning, then follow thru on punishment, evenif the child does what is expected when u get up, too late!!

I agree about consistency, and taking away privileges. I also think that when you take the time to "reason" (depending on how your doing it) it can give him the impression arguing with you is acceptable behavior, or that perhaps he can wear you down to do what he wants. Tell him how it is, and ignore him if he comes back with an attitude. Let him throw a fit, and see that he's the only one his fit is effecting. Walk away! If you stand firm, and REWARD and PRAISE him for the good things he does he will likely start to see that possitive behavior is what will get your attention and earn him priveleges. He's old enough to learn that you have to work for the things you want (with good attitude). Does he have any household chores, to allow him to learn a sense of responsibility and self-disapline? He probably is a good student because it is up to him to do the work, and behave in class, this gives him a sense of accomplishment. When children are constantly catered to they stop appreciating the things they have....I've seen it a million times. I'm a nanny of 3. One of them is a 10 yr. old that I had similar problems with in the beginning. I did exactally what I'm telling you, and things are better now.

I used to make my neices and nephews scrub floors or some other chore and tell them if you have enough energy to mouth off you have enough energy to do chores, you can also take away everything in his room but his bed and clothing and slowly let him earn the items back

Since your child is ten years old, I suggest taking away things that he enjoys for certain amount of time, and sticking to that commitment. Say he enjoys the computer, next time he's mouthy or bisbehaves badly take away all his computer privellages for a week or two depending on what he's done, and stick to your word. This will let him know that you and his step-dad mean business, and that you will not put up with his bad behavior. In time, he will get tired of losing his privalleges. I've used this technique, and this technique was used on me when i was younger, and I promise it works, expecially with older children.

But, r emember to always be consistent with your rules, and always be realistic with your rules. (Ex. of not being consistent and realistic: Saying, "Stop throwing the ball inside the house! I'm going to count to three. 1-2-2 1/2 - 2 3/4- 3. Okay, now. I'm going to have to take away the ball forever. Bring me the ball. 1-2-3-4-5. " ) I know that for some parents there rules don't remain consistent, and are unrealistic, but for you this may not be the case.

I hope my suggestion will help you.

Pick a calm, relaxed time (don't wait until he is yelling and being disrespectful--talk to him before hand) then explain to him exactly what will not be tolerated. For example, raising his voice, name-calling, disrespect, etc. Then outline what punishment he will receive for the offense. Be specific, exact and detailed. You may even want to write it down so that it is clear to him what the consequences are. As far as the punishment goes, you may have to try different methods until you hit on what works best. My mother used to "wash our mouths out with soap" -- we learned very quickly and NEVER mouthed off. I believe in paddling also but, if it is not effective, try something else. Like the other answers suggest, taking away privileges, grounding, etc. may be effective. When something starts to have a positive response, stick with it. Mtnrescue-guy is right about consistency. It is probably the most important thing regarding discipline.