How can she get over him?

Its good that your sister has realised what kind of a person that guy is and now when she wants to move out of the relationship, he is not letting her do so coz of one simple reason. He knows deep inside what kind of a person he is as he can cheat anyone but cant run away from himself. He knows this well enough that he wont get a person like your sister who can hang around with him (at least for now). The moment he finds another one he will try to dump your sister. He is nothing more than a leech.

Ask your sister to face the things boldly and give him right on his face in front of everyone that he is no good a man even and she cant imagine her life with a sucker. Tell him if he is a man of character he should stop following her around and walk away. If still he doesntt, take help of police who will st him right.

The early your sister gets away from him, the better is for her life.

God bless!

Regards.

I can see why he wants to keep her. She supports him and allows him to do what he wants. If she leaves he will have no resources. In a situation like this, if your sister wants to move, then she should.

I have been in this situation and I had these same issues plus serious abuse also. This is how I got out.

I am assuming that your sister is working. Tell her to open a savings account in her name only that will remain secret. Also she will need a P.O. box also secret. It would also be a good idea to create a new email address that she does not access from her own home. These things are important because you don't want him to follow her in anyway.

it sounds like he is away from the house alot with his friends and that is to her advantage.

The hard part here is that this will take a little time. The first thing that she needs to do is try to save some money in the unknown acct. She will not be doing herself any favors with out enough money. After she has stored up what she feels is enough, she needs to get herself a storage unit, billed to her PO box. Then everytime he leaves to go with his friends she can start packing what she needs and putting in her secret safe place. I would suggest that she do this in a slow manner because you dont want him to know what is up. Eventually he will start noticing things are missing.

If this man has an aptitude for violence (and it sounds like he might) then I would suggest that your sister go to where she can use a computer and start applying for jobs out of the area using her secret email address.

You don't mention if your sister has children with this man but if she does she will have to handle that aspect in the same secret way.
The important thing is that she take her time to organize, plan, then execute her plan flawlessly.

One last thing to you and your family. When she leaves make sure you have her write down where, and when. She may even want to get a prepaid cell phone that only you have the number to. her husband is going to call you and the rest of your family. At first just say you haven't heard from her. Do not get into the conversation with him about what a looser he is or the things he did. he will be looking for a fight and it should not be with you. Before she leaves you may want to take her to the police station and her her explain what she is doing and when. Then she is covered.

This is just a basic sketch and the way I did it and you may not want to go to this extreme. For me it was a matter of life and death and hopefully your sister is not dealing with alot of that.

Unfortunately I went through this for 12 years before I did anything about it. I heard the same story, the drama, the story, the love, the forgiveness and believe I still went on. You can't change a person to see what you see. I didn't see even when dozen of people warn me, I laughed and I found out the hard way. Now I have moved on and I do not speak or correspond anymore. Y ou can try to talk but if it doesn't work, put your hat on the rack and let the person learn by theirselves. We can preach, but it doesn't matter, if theydon't understand it is a circle that goes around thousands of times. Good Luck

I am going through this now and it is hard im am trying to not talk to him now but those kind of guys are just brainwashers. the worst part is i have a baby with this guy i cant get rid of him! tell her to spend time with friends ignore his calls anything that has to do with him. and tell her to tell him when he is willing to change they can be again but if not dont bother. this is really hard and i know u want to help ur sister out just spend time with her get her away from thinking about him or even talking to him again.. these type of guys are sick! they dont know what they want!

Being a sister to her, she's a lucky to have a sister like you. Tell to your sister that she keep busy in activities, schools if she still study, hung outs with her good friends and most of all ask a guidance to the God and pray that someday she met someone who truly love her. Love is like a wheel cycle, you been love and hurt, hurt and love again.Most important you learn from your past that you select a good one for you.

Your sister knows deep down inside what she needs to do. Your sister is very smart believe it or not. Continue to advice her when she looks like she is eager to hear it. Tell her that she knows she could be happier with another that would treat her like a princess. Someone who wont make her stand a chance in contracting a sexual disease or the kissing disease mononucleosis. See sometimes we wish that we could fix our loved ones' issues. I know because I'm that way with my sister and she's older than me. I found that no matter how hard I tried I couldn't live for her. To a certain extent it is true that when you try to control the situation you are living through it in a way. She ended doing what she wanted to afterall. You should see it as "the good thing is that you have been there for her, and always will. You can give her advice. If she decides to take it, it's her choice. If not too bad." Regardless you need to try to focus more on you. That doesn't mean don't be concerned with your sister's problems. Then again, sometimes no matter how happy I am or how I tend to have all I need at times, I end up feeling selfish because my sister isn't feeling that way. The goog thing that you have love in your heart. Your sister may not have a great man but is blessed with a true sister.

It's good that your sister has you for support, but she may still be in denial and think something will work, otherwise she wouldn't have let this go on for this long.

I'am going thought this right now i can tell you that it hard to let go when you love someone i keep telling myself that i'am gonna leave him in then he tell me he loves me in can;t see hisself with out me in i fall to pieces again it hard but i know that if you give her time she will relize he aint wroth it she will relize she can do better but then again you said she want to move on if she scare for her safely she can get a epo agaist him then he won't be able to get arould her if she lives with him in need to get her stuff she can have someone go with her to get it even a police office will go with her there are also places that help in this kind of stuff has she try doves this program will help her with food housing in there give her a cell phone that she call only call 911 one in case he try to talk or hurt her will she out

here is the website

http://www.dovesprogram.com/

All she has to do is grow up and tell him to take a hike. No mater how much it hurts, she has to show him the door and slam it behind him. If he persists and can't take the hint, he has the problem and can be dealt with legally - restraining orders, stalking charges. If that doesn't work she can rock him to sleep - using some big rocks from the backyard bt it's her call. Of course if you see him do something like hit her, push er, etc by all means call the police. In domestic violence cases he can be arrested even if she refuses to file charges.