Break-Up through Me

No, it's not right at all. I hope you don't get mad at me saying this, but it's a very cowardly thing to do. She should be "cleaning" her own messes, not have you do the dirty work.

I guess you did the right thing by telling your friend about the break up, as you don't want him just hanging there. You could always talk with him more, to help him feel a little bit better about the situation.

Next time, if possible, try not to let your sister put you in that situation where you have to talk to someone for her. That is wrong, and the ultimate sad part is later on in life, she won't have you to do it for her. Break ups are going to be very hard on her, and she has to learn that it's part of dating.

It's obviously hard for her to do it, so maybe talk to her without getting too upset to let her know that it is her responsibility to tell the other person that she is no longer interested in dating anymore. She owes it to the other person, as they both were part of the relationship.

It's wrong on all accounts. Your sister seems to be a little messed up. Given the fact she didn't feel guilty about hurting this other persons feelings. You did the right thing by letting your friend know the truth.

I feel sorry for your sister and the fact she has no regard for other peoples feelings. He's much better off without her for sure.

What your sister did to this guy was highly irresponsible, cowardly and extremely cold. What she did to you borders on inexcusable, partially because it sets in motion a pattern of behavior that neither you nor anyone else should be made to be a part of. You have every right to be angry about this and are entitled to tell her exactly how you feel without any remorse. If your sister ever attempts to put you in this position again, find a way to have him coincidentally show up somewhere in public so she would be forced to deal with it. Easier said than done, I realize. But if you can pull it off and stand your ground, she will eventually come to understand your anger with her, even though at the time it happens, she'll be the furious one. Too bad, she deserves it. You don't. She needs to understand that she has to clean up the messes she makes, just like when you were younger. And you need to make sure that if you see this kind of situation coming, you're not going to be there running interference for her.

Thank you all this was really helpful. But I do want to say one thing about my sister. Maybe the reason why she didn't seem so guilty about it is that she keeps everything bottled in. So maybe there is some guilt but I don't know. She doesn't like to tell people what her feelings are. She is just confused, I suppose. But I forgiver her but I won't let her make me do that again. It was hard to do because you could hear the pain in his voice and it was horrible to hear. And by the way Laotian842 I was thinking about have him show up somewhere coincidentally and have her handled it herself, unfortunately I couldn't plan that out quick enough because he had found out that my sister was going to break up with him so that was where this whole mess started about her making me break up with him for her. But thank you guys so much!

This explanation makes you a pretty awesome sibling to be related to. It sounds like your sister could use some therapy. Nothing real intense, just enough for her to at least open up about what she's feeling, enough for her to deal with her own tough dilemmas. If you feel close enough to her to suggest it, then you should. Your recent description of your sister depicts her as someone rational and realistic enough to realize that you're right. This would solve both of your problems, because you really should not have to live in fear that you might be put in this kind of situation again. She just needs to see that.

In breaking-up relationship, it is important to remember to tell the boy what he has done wrong, or he will wonder why she doesn't love him anymore, or she doesn't find him attractive anymore, or he becomes boring to him anymore. If the break-up will course through you, your sister will have to tell you all these intimate problems. Now which is the hardest thing,to confess to you or tell it straight herself to her boyfriend.