I work 2 jobs other works none, what should i do?

Obviously, he doesn't want to take care of his responsibilities. I would talk to him/her about it, tell them exactly how you feel, and if they don't change...tell him to take a hike! This person isn't worth your time at all.

Ouch! That is a tough situation. Studies over the past 40 years have found that men that do not work, have less education or makes less than their wives do 60% less housework than men who work and make more money than their partner. Knowing, that remember not to nag. I know this can be your first instinct, but people react more to reinforcement than punishment.

Another thing that seems to help, is to sit down when you aren't angry and talk about this. Let him know that you need his help. Then make a list of all of the chores that he could take over to help you out and ask him when he wants to do them (dishes after dinner, trash in the morning, laundry on Tuesdays). This way he will still feel like he is in control. If he simply refuses to help with anything, then he is not putting in his time and you need to go to counseling to see if he is just plain lazy or if this is a manifestation of a deeper problem (lack of self confidence to find a job, resentment towards you and his responsibilities)

Get him out of your way. Don't you feel like you are raising another child with him around? Obviously you are not ok with him not working, tell him to go to work or be a house-wife...

He's going to have to step up to the plate. Try encouraging him in a positive way. Maybe a part time job at first will help him get in the loop.

Talk to him about depression as well. As this can be signs of depression.

Have a heart to heart and figure out a years plan to get him back on his feet. Assign a chore list for everyone who is old enough to accomplish cleaning. Even the little child can pick up their toys or put their shoes away. This list will help alievate the heavy cleaning load you are experiencing.

You can plan activities that make things fun. like getting everyone involved in keeping the yard nice. Showing the kids how to plant plants, rake leaves, water the lawn. Getting the whole family involved can help your husband enjoy daily acivities and chores.

That is a tough situation to be in for sure.

if he has no desire to work, have you asked him why he doesn't want to work? i'm assuming he is able to work.

do you still love him? is this a deal breaker for your relationship if he won't work?

Maybe he isn't worth the time to stay with? do you love him?

would you still love him if he kept going like this?

it isn't right to just sit there and let you work your tail off. have you talked with him about it?

Stop feeding the deadbeat. Hunger can be a great motivator.

I'm with LissaC on this one. Drop the bum and find someone who will make you happy. People are the way they are and the unfortunate tendency of frustrated partners is to believe they can change the other partner's behavior even when there is no credible evidence that is possible.

You deserve to be happy and that's not going to happen with this partner. Find another one.

This answer was edited by ldsch 68 days ago.

Reason: Slight change to answer.

I think it's time to get rid of the deadbeat. You have children and they learn by example. Before you know it you are going to have him and adult children doing nothing. Try to think of your children and how much more you will have if he isn't living off of you.